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By Newprimus, 17 January, 2012 2:50 PM

SAGA PLANETS’ trial for their newest offering, Hatsuyuki Sakura, has been out for a while so most of you might have already played through it. Not to mention someone needs to breathe some life into this blog, otherwise it’s going to become a tomb haunted by ghosts. Fitting that the game I’ll talk about today is about such denizens of the other world.

Ran, the girl above, lives with Hatsuyuki, who is most definetly not the usual male lead. He’s a brooding, cold, lone wolf of guy. Blunt and often mean in his way of talking to other people, feared by many and respected by some. He holds sorrow deep inside his heart, and he has no hopes or expectations for his future, but perhaps there is some kindness underneath that cold exterior. He is so different from what you’d normally expect. Have you heard of anyone else who tells a girl off by telling her to go home and masturbate?

His tale and the game’s story starts when he meets the main heroine of the game, Tamaki Sakura, one cold winter night when he’s chasing after some rabbit that has stolen his money. She has come to this town searching for something called the ghost child, and Hatsuyuki ends up becoming involved in her little ghost-hunting quest. I will say one thing about all the characters in general, and that is SAGA PLANETS has refrained from using cheap, moe personality traits to bring appeal to their characters. In their previous game, Kisaragi Gold Star, you could easily observe what moe archetype each character takes after but that’s fortunately not so much the case in this game. What draws you to the people of this game is what’s revealed of them through Hatsuyuki’s interactions with them. They are more than a collection of moe labels, and there are hints that there may be more behind them than what you simply see or hear on the outside.

The next thing that makes Hatsuyuki Sakura wonderful is everything else. The graphics, superb. The music, wonderful to listen to and creates the right kind of mood. The OP’s also spectacular, like Rolling Star in the previous game. Which in the case of Hatsuyuki Sakura is a seamless blend of school romance and supernatural mystery, a surprisingly excellent fusion of comedy and drama. The light-hearted antics of Sakura, Nozomu, and the other girls contrast starkly to the mellow, sometimes sad malaise that pervades Hatsuyuki’s private life, the exact nature of which you won’t fully know until the end of the prologue–and when you do the story takes on a serious, even dark tone. Not overtly, but with subtlety that lurks in the background, never in your face unless the moment is right, and when it is the game delivers like a freight train. A story is well-written when the first act closes with the audience knowing exactly what kind of journey the characters must now take for the rest of the tale, and the end of Hatsuyuki Sakura sets the score to be settled so strongly you are just as determined and set on what you have to do, just like Hatsuyuki at the end of the trial.

Beautiful is what this game is. At the very least I am enjoying this hell of a lot more than Kisaragi Gold Star. Hatsuyuki Sakura is a more serious story, perhaps even moreso than Natsuyume Nagisa. The game’s a lot like Lump of Sugar’s Itsu-Sora in some respects. You sure as hell wouldn’t think so by visiting the game’s official site or looking at all the screenshots, but mark my words and prepare yourself. This game is no leisurely stroll through the neighborhood, but a foreboding trek through a haunted forest. In winter.

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By Newprimus, 11 April, 2011 5:01 PM

Clochette-soft is one of my favorite eroge companies, so when I saw the trial announcement for upcoming game Kamikaze Explorer on the company’s site I dropped everything, and about twenty minutes later I was smoking divine weed or something.

If you know or have played one of their earlier games, Suzunone Seven, then Kamikaze Explorer will not be a total stranger to you. It takes place in a similar modern world with magic sprinkled on it. The magic is called Metis and those who are able to call upon their own unique Metis power are called Metispers. Hayase Keiji is our protagonist who gets transferred to Suminoe, a high school built to train and develop Metispers, even though he doesn’t have a power of his own (yet). A familiar pattern follows: male lead becomes friends with his genki and highly sociable class pres who shows him around, reunites with an osanajimi whom he hasn’t seen in one and a half years, gets rescued from a pinch by a rich ojousama kouhai and her minions, meets the disciplinary committe chief sempai, and later the imouto transfers into the school in pursuit of her beloved brother. Oh yeah and the ojousama recruits Keiji and the class rep into her club, which is supposed to go around school and help random people with random problems or something. Like rescuing kittens and such. And lastly the male protagonist starts to discover his own, unique Metis power!! Oooooh~

It’s all familiar eroge standard fare, but that’s somewhat unavoidable if you want to make a great eroge, and some of the various eroge standards and archetypes like the osanajimi, the imouto, and the ojousama persist as stereotypes because they’re extremely fun if done right. Clochette-soft is one of those eroge companies that does it right. They take the stereotypes and bend them in interesting ways, and package it all with a well-paced story that moves along and doesn’t meander (like Grisaia) or downright stagnate (looking at you, Kiss, Maou and Tea).

First there’s the protagonist. Keiji, like nearly all eroge protagonists, is sociable, kind, smart, and dense as neutronium. His obliviousness to the affections of all the girls around him makes you wanna smash your head on something. So the game makes it one of its focal points. The osanajimi, Okihara Kotoha, has longed after Keiji for a long time since their childhood and had given up trying to get him to notice her feelings but hasn’t forgotten about him. This game plays from the girls’ perspectives a lot, much more so than the majority of other games. It’s not like feng’s Hoshikaka where you choose a girl’s POV at the end of every chapter. In Kamikaze Explorer the POV is not strictly set upon Keiji, and is more neutral and third-person in a sense. A girl’s thoughts can pop up during a conversation, the game POV switches to girls somewhere else in the school, and all this occurs frequently. It’s actually jarring at first because you’re not used to being shown the girls’ perspectives so often, but it works out because for example in the case of Kotoha you can see just how frustrated she is with Keiji as her advances and invitations bounce off of his wall of donkkan. It’s very nice to be able to directly sympathize and root for a heroine like Kotoha as she tries once again to get Keiji to recognize her love for him after having given up for a long time.

Now you’ve got a donkkan male lead. What better opponent for him than a female heroine who is nearly just as dense as he is about love? Himekawa Fuuka is the first girl Keiji meets and she’s his classmate (along with Kotoha) and class president. She shows him around the campus and becomes a constant companion since day 1. When Keiji is brought into the Argonaut club she desperately joins as well; despite the fact that she has never joined a club yet so far, stating her class rep duties as the reason why she supposedly can’t afford the time. She’s roommates with Kotoha and later you get a conversation between them where Kotoha realizes that Fuuka is pretty much in love with Keiji, but the latter has no idea that she is. Seeing whose wall of neutronium is denser should be intersting.

Yutenji Mishio is the ojousama character, but she’s no ordinary ojousama. Her Metis power is Promines and it’s basically fire spam. Her appearance and demeanor are equally fiery and she gives off a commanding, almost domineering presence you’d expect from the daughter of a hugely wealthy and powerful family. Except it’s all FAKE. :D Not the Metis power or the wealthy ojousama bit, those are very real. But underneath that haughty exterior is this completely timid, meek girl who wants nothing more than to get closer to the boy she loves. Which is Keiji, and it seems like she’s met him a long time ago, but he obviously doesn’t remember. She’s also a kouhai. And her two servant/bodyguard girls are totally awesome. One is basically Azumanga Daioh’s Sakaki: tall, big breasts and katana skill on the outside but soft and loves cute things on the inside. The other is this short, small-chested 3rd year who is the most devious thing in human skin and delights in watching her mistress sweat and squirm as she unsuccessfully tries to perfect her domineering ojousama guise. Mishio’s also voiced by Aoyama Yukari, who uses both her soft and hard voice simultaneously for this role. And her H-scene in the trial rocked my balls off. AND her pinup is the most tastefully sexy. Obviously you know who my favorite heroine in the game is so far. ;)

Usami Saori is the sempai. And the chief of the disciplinary committe. Except she’s one of those what do you call it…. oh yeah, a dame-ko. Frequently on the receiving end of the butt-end of a lot of situations, mocked frequently, and worst of all her roommate’s one of Mishio’s minions. The 3rd year. Yes, the one that’s like satan on female legs or something. And she’s got a vendetta against Mishio’s club. And against Keiji because he saw her panties and flashed it to the rest of the cast. If you for some reason don’t enjoy the fact that every other member of the cast has superbly awesome tits, Saori’s got your relative flatness to satisfy your DFC needs.

Hayase Manami is the imouto. If it’s a romance eroge, you’ve got to have the imouto. Energetic, sociable, big breasts on a loli body. Very perceptive and sees through Mishio’s disguise almost instantly, and soon becomes friends with her. Forces one of the school’s recruiters to let her transfer into Suminoe. Totally raburabu over her brother to the point of perceiving all the other girls as dangers to Keiji’s purity, but keeps denying it. Oh and the parents totally know about Keiji’s denseness and Manami’s blatant bro-con but don’t really do anything about it. :D

The production values of this eroge are quite top-notch. High resolution, well-done interface. Character art is very, very good and there’s a lot of movement from the characters on-screen. As I mentioned earlier, pacing is very good. The story probably won’t be one of those deep ones like Subarashiki Hibi or something, but for a romance comedy it’s hard to beat something like this. Too bad this game comes May 27th, which feels like an eternity away. At the very least I’ll leave everyone these samples of Mishio and Kotoha smexy. If you fap hard enough you might pass out long enough and wake up on the 27th :)

Getchu site: http://www.getchu.com/soft.phtml?id=688507

Game site: http://clochette-soft.jp/kamikaze/index.html

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By Hemisphere, 4 March, 2011 1:03 AM

I have been just abso-fucking-lutely lazy.

Lemme get some quickies out of the way. Previous titles I’ve played, as well as my REALLY quick, short impressions, are as follows. Bloody Rondo was unbelievably disappointing shit but I <3 Luna and Alice despite their motherfucking routes, Draculius blew my fucking mind so go play Draculius now omg, Damamuko was meh and it made me want to rip my penis off, Orange Memories = Hinoto fuckans despite the occasionally crap art, HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT RYUHEI AND SOL IN SOUKYUU NO SOLEIL, and of course, KAMIDORI TRIAL KAMIDORI TRIAL KAMIDORI TRIAL. Which blew my mind and got me fucking obsessed, you know, over a fucking trial. Yeah. I’m gonna slave over that trial like I slaved over VERITA’s trial (gunning both Celica and Ekria to Lv. 400 fuck yeah).

I’m going to come out with reviews for both Bloody Rondo and Damamuko, because they disappointed both me and my penis. Well, okay, Alice was delishuz and both she and Luna made my penis very, very happy, but that’s about it. Probably a review for Soukyuu no Soleil too, once I get around to finishing all the fucking routes and not just Odette’s. The sight of both Sol and Ryuhei (in a sense) just kinda blew me away, so I forgot to do that. Cause, you know…it’s fukken Sol. And Ryuhei. Fuck yeah. Soleil fans unite! I’m sure the entire two of us can have a super-awesome discussion over the entire series’ closure (or more like lack of it).

An impressions post is definitely gonna be up on Kamidori’s trial. Cause April 22 is just so fukken far away. While it is a (VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY) tiny glimpse as to Eushully’s new direction after the end of their Ikusa Megami series, the combination of lighthearted +very haremy action + more eroero themes definitely has me going (￣u￣;) ﾊｧﾊｧｾﾞｪｾﾞｪ…I mean, Ｏ(≧▽≦)Ｏ ﾜｰｲ♪ Plus it never hurts to talk more about Eushully’s awesomeness! EUSHULLY BANZAI! That. and, you know. April 22 is so. Fucking. Far away.

The agony. Oh, the agony.

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By Hemisphere, 5 January, 2011 8:10 PM

What’s this? No Christmas or New Years post? Yeah, well, I got tired of doing that shit two years ago or something. Anyways, Kamidori Alchemy Meisters Demo Movie up – download is here. In case you haven’t heard of this title, stop living under that rock and take a look around the website.

At first glance, Kamidori looks like a less-chaotic Himegari Dungeon Meisters, and I’d partly be inclined to agree. Partly, because, Kamidori doesn’t really so much look like it’s a light-hearted take on Himegari, but rather, Tayu Uta’s feel with Himegari’s system. Which I am totally okay with, seeing as Eushully’s gotten over the male lead archetype reminiscent of the one in Tayu Uta.

And in case you might be led to believe that Kamidori’s gonna be all cheerful and happy with butterflies and rainbows and sparkly shit, please remember that this is Eushully that’s producing this game. The demo alone already shows the main characters getting embroiled in a war, which should be interesting. Knowing Eushully, that’s just going to be the bare tip of the iceberg.

By the way: if Rifia and Evalyne are extra characters via append (remember, they’re heading to where Kamidori takes place), but Louie, Carian, Fami and Petrene are following the both of them…does that mean Louie and company MIGHT show up in Kamidori as well?

I personally love how Kamidori ties into the main lore (that is, the 戦女神 series) with the aforementioned disaster (the demon dragon incident, most likely). If I recall, this is the first time a title outside of Ikusa Megami gets linked to it, which is intriguing to say the least. I’m sure Kamidori is going to have a story that will stand on its own, but I’m curious as to whether they’ll include any connections or references to the events of VERITA.

Gameplay wise, I’m very much taken aback and deeply interested with the new system additions. I’ve always wondered how it would feel if Eushully tried their own hand at making an Atelier series clone, and it seems Kamidori’s the title for it. In the screenshots I’ve seen of the missions, it seems that Eushully has limited the number of units deployable to four, which is fair for making more challenging scenarios. Himegari had up to a total of nine deployable units, and all I did back then was just send out everyone and just blitz through an area.

Lastly, Yuera and Seraui are still bitching HOT. I always felt that I’d make Yuera my main in Kamidori, and that feeling just grows stronger with every additional information released. Also, I’m curious as to exactly how popular Sylphine’s route in Himegari must have been…not that I’m saying that there’s a direct connection between the popularity and impact of that ending to everyone who played Himegari, and Kamidori’s lighter-than-Himegari feel. Just curious.

Bloody Rondo’s trial was released 31 December 2010, and is available here. Look it up if you’ve got an interest in vampires and that stuff. From what I’ve played, it’s a jumbled mess of events and serves to only give us sneak peeks of the characters involved, so don’t expect to understand much of the story’s premise via the trial alone. It’s also got some preview H scenes, which are around five to six lines of dialogue at best per H scene preview. I’m rooting for Luna, Linette, Francesca and Alice, whoohoo.

I like the system’s appearance, keeping with the whole bloody vampires thing. I also like how some of the events look animated, the use of cut-ins, and I definitely love the seiyuu line-up for Bloody Rondo. An all-star seiyuu cast, if you can call it…it’s just insane. I just hope it won’t end up anything like Hyakka Ryouran…all-star ensemble, but bleh.

There’s also Damamuko’s trial, here. It’s interesting, and hilarious from what I’ve seen so far. My only gripes would be that the lead is too damn whiny about what happened between him and Reona during the past, and that the h-scene in the trial felt forced and totally out of place. Long live Rin versus Reona!

Now to die one day at a time until April 22 hits.

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By Hemisphere, 15 December, 2010 3:50 AM

It’s time for that again! Yes, yes, I know I made like two posts on the matter, but what can I say. You can’t keep a good harem meister down for long, this world just holds many wonders that must be explored! Battles to be fought! Bishoujos to be conquered! Routes to be completed! Such is the path of the enthusiast!

So allow me to indulge in my enthusiasm by creating my updated harem list (which obviously will not stay canon for long considering the titles to be released next year, THANK YOU KAMIDORI ALCHEMY MEISTER) involving bishoujos from the games I’ve played that were released on 2008 onwards. Plus, it helps knowing that all this was done for fun, just in case some people take this in an overzealous manner.

But before that, the rules!
- Total count of 8 bishoujos + 1 maid
- No anime adaptations
- No characters with similar seiyuu
- Only one girl from a title is allowed

So with that, douzo!

1. Tenrou Kunagi (天楼久 那妓); Title: 大番長－Big Bang Age－; CV: 岩居由希子(Yukiko Iwai)

LIKE HELL KUNAGI ISN’T GONNA BE PART OF THIS LIST. Merry has his Airi, I have my Kunagi! The day Kunagi gets taken off MY list is the day I die! After all, Kunagi is an invaluable asset, due to her insane agility and how early you get access to her in-game. I’ve defended entire territories with just Kunagi alone, as she would just evade everyone’s attack while lashing out with her own nasty counterattacks. It takes some training and a lot of focus on Kunagi, but it is damn well worth it.

Character-wise, “focused” helps in describing her character. Kunagi’s the kind of character that can barely be fazed by anything that happens (except for things that happen in bed, kukuku~), not because she’s an ice queen but because she has an inner calm that comes from a strong resolve and presence of mind. I suppose part of that is due to her having lived as a wolf for some time, as well as the events in her past and the burden she chose to bear . She’s not an ice queen nor is she emotionally distant from everyone as she does involve herself with others, which is a good balance as her character leans away from extremes. Plus, in any fight, it helps to have a calm, reasonable head in order to adapt to anything and stay one step ahead of the enemy, and Kunagi’s exactly that. Not to mention, being utterly hard to hit is a major plus.

During lovemaking, Kunagi is just crazy awesome. She’s not only open to the act, but is also willing to serve in order to pleasure her partner, or be served in order to be pleasured. She still gets embarrassed moments, of course, and tends to initially reject anything she’s unfamiliar with, or seems abnormal, but once she gets drowned in the pleasure – the whole thing with her just turns crazy hot. And once she starts to lose herself to the pleasure, her crooning, passionate moans just echo in my head, reverberates through my body, erases all thought and makes the entire scene just THAT much more succulent and sensual. Gives me the chills. Never mind the reprimands and the physical payback that she’d deal out afterward thanks to being ashamed, but it’s all PART OF THE LOVE, BABY. Also the hilarious fact that, gameplay-wise, fucking her restores up to 50% health…is this an incentive for me to go out there and get injured just to get some healing fuckans?

It’s a damn shame that she can’t maintain her adult form due to the stress that it takes on her, but hell…considering the rest of my harem’s members, I’m sure there’s no problem I’ll be able to solve. And her outfit sense? I love that shit. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone resembling Kunagi, which is a good thing considering how generic and identical looking characters are in contemporary titles.

2. Narukana (ナルカナ); Title: 聖なるかな; CV: 一色ヒカル(Hikaru Issiki)

Yes, I have a fetish for women wearing Japanese-fashioned outfits. It’s apparent with Kunagi, and it’s also apparent with Narukana. I also have a thing for utterly gorgeous, graceful bishoujos with long, dark hair. But that’s not the full extent of it! If Kunagi is a wolf on the battlefield, Narukana would be a goddamn tsunami wailing down on her enemies without mercy. The most-beautiful, most-powerful and most-merciful (all of those are self-proclaimed) Narukana, the incarnation of Rank 1 Murakumo, definitely has a spot in my harem.

Gameplay-wise, Narukana is just a beast, dubbed the “can I win now button” by those who played Seinarukana during it’s release. And by hell does that nickname truly live up to her performance. Despite being an innate Red element, she can freely use all five elements for attack, defense or support, and her stats as well as her skills puts her above everyone else in terms on combat performance. She can literally tear up an entire battlefield all by herself without breaking a sweat – provided of course that IT or clear rank is of no concern. And it’s worth noting that her power is exponentially limited due to these two factors: one, that Murakumo has been sealed into various parts, and second, that Murakumo’s true power only shows once a wielder contracts with it. Truly a powerful and fearsome Eien Shinken, and that’s not counting the fact that Murakumo’s power is Naru mana!

But to focus too much on the weapon is to lose sight of the bishoujo that makes it so valuable! Narukana, as the incarnation of Murakumo, didn’t just manage to tug my heartstrings because of her power, but also because of her absolutely awesome, mind-blowing greatness (any less praise would be deemed unworthy by Narukana, you see). Shallow, childish, self-centered, arrogant, airheaded, petty, trivial, insensitive (I should stop here before I meet my untimely end) on the surface, yet actually compassionate, caring, responsible, and considerate deep within, the character that she presents to others is a result of her insecurities and doubts due to her – Murakumo’s – nature as a “cursed sword” and “bane of existence”. The scenes of her selfishly helping herself to Nozomu’s manga and snacks while reading all day, or pretending to know the solution for helping Nozomi, Satsuki and Salles, were indeed adorable and amusing, but her true worth shines when her facade is all cleared away. Once Narukana revealed her nagging doubts and her suppressed feelings, that was it for me. GAME OVER MAN.

Sure, she only had one H scene in-game, but who’s to say that there can’t be any more? (*´Д`)ﾊｧﾊｧ

3. Shihoudo Narika (四方堂　ナリカ); Title: 超昂閃忍ハルカ; CV: 青葉りんご(Ringo Aoba)

Aoba Ringo playing a pink-haired twintail tsundere pettanko ninja whose weapon is a huge four-bladed shuriken that is actually a four-winged pink snake thing when not in use? What’s there not to like? Part of the cheerleading club, and is competent with cooking and other household chores, she’s also a brutal landlady – capable of detecting and pinpointing any and all porn that might be hidden in the vicinity. As if I’d NEED any other porn when Narika’s around, ha! Fast and agile (as fast as Kunagi, if Widenyo is to be believed) thanks to her petite figure and training, I’d rely on Narika for information gathering and spying, particularly on enemies – after all, that’s what ninjas were originally used for. I’d also rely on her for providing cooking, washing and the like for me and the rest of my harem members; while most of them are living breathing beings capable of mass destruction in the blink of an eye, basic cooking skills seem to have passed them by.

Of course, seeing as she’s a tsundere, I’d have to carefully balance her tsuntsun and deredere! Not that tsuntsun Narika isn’t any cute…just that she might end up not making food out of too much tsun, and I don’t want to starve to death. With regards to fighting, seeing as she’s a Sennin, she’s definitely capable of holding her own in combat with her martial skills and her big-ass shuriken. If her abilities aren’t sufficient…there’s always the ichaicha road to power! Besides, seeing as Chouko Sennin mode requires a lot of…*ahem* power-ups to be done, it’s definitely a welcome option to power up Narika everyday!

Seeing as her power is fire, it’s appropriate for her fiery tsundere personality. It’s also perfect for keeping the fires of love burning, baby! Narika is definitely open to a lot of things when it comes to fuckans…just that I’d prefer to stay away from the stuff that’d turn her into Dark Narika.

4. Asuku San (明日宿 傘); Title: いつか、届く、あの空に。; CV: ひと美(Hitomi)

The unforgettable oneesan figure with a more-than-murderous killing intent hidden beneath her gentle facade. If I ever wanted an entire city obliterated without resorting to Narukana, I’d bring her to that city, tell her they ran out of ice cream and that they think she’s fat, and run the flying fuck out of there as the carnage begins. She faced down a freaking tank with absolutely no damage, after all – and then sliced the shit in half! She’s probably deadlier than Hei of Darker than Black when it comes to assassination. Shit won’t be pretty once she’s done wreaking havoc, guaranteed, and I doubt anything would survive once she’s on the warpath. Seeing as not only conventional weapons, like tanks, don’t have any effect on her, but also magic and such, San is the absolute counter-measure to ANYTHING. Maybe even a nuclear warhead. I don’t know. Just hope you don’t end up on the opposite end of her “parasol” or have to find out.

Let’s see: ponytail, check. White-grayish hair, check. Weapon that functions as a parasol, that also functions as a perpetual black hole capable of producing food wherever and whenever in order to sate her insane appetites while still able to keep her ridiculously sexy figure, check. San also serves an important function, not just in battle, but also outside of it. Her tranquil, peaceful, easygoing demeanor would help keep everyone’s spirits calm and relaxed in everyday life. Her usual mannerisms makes me go “fuwafuwa” as it’s not just relaxing, but cute as hell. As a senpai and an oneesan, she also fulfills that role well: giving advice when it counts, helping out whenever she needs to, despite being an overall mysterious figure. I wouldn’t want to let her get into my food reserves though. She’d blow through those just as fast as she’d destroy an entire battalion.

Fuckans-wise, San might take a bit more convincing seeing as her H scene in the game was “forced”, but that doesn’t mean it can stop there! I demand San ashikoki! YES! San deserves much love, and I’m here to give it to her! Hmm, I wonder if I can win the way to her bed with food…

5. Fujita Nodoka (藤田 のどか); Title: PARA-SOL; CV: 理多(Rita)

Fujita Nodoka! Codename Keraunos, there is nothing her sword cannot cut! That’s actually in-game, and it is also Nodoka’s ability. Her ability to cleave heavily relies on her aptitude, however, so she can’t just cleave everything without breaking a sweat, unlike, say, San. She is more than capable of handling her sword and fighting enemies tougher than her, thanks to her being a PARASOL. As Nodoka, however, she is very versatile with household help, far better than Narika’s level as Nodoka learned how to become an effective maid. She can handle cooking with ease, laundy is no problem for her, cleaning is no sweat, shopping’s a breeze, and she’s particularly good with waking people up. “Coffee, me, or a knife slitting the jugular” is her usual offer early in the mornin-err, I think I’d like to skip that last option please.

Whenever she’s around others, she’s the perfect ideal wife given flesh. Reserved, friendly and helpful to everyone – but get her alone, and she turns into a completely different person provided that the person she’s with knows of her PARASOL nature. This violent side of her tingles my doM instincts so bad, I can’t help but swoon – and sweat profusely – whenever she does her violent “affectionate gestures”. In case I forget anything, Nodoka would be glad to help refresh my memory by swiftly stabbing a katana mere centimeters from my head! I don’t know how effective that would be, but she’d be more than happy to provide the assistance – whether I’d like it or not. It’s this insane tension that partly draws me to Nodoka’s character – the other part being her battle performance, of course!

When it comes to matters of more intimate concerns, Nodoka does not disappoint. Her affectionate, sweet nature reminds me of a cat, one that is as capable of snuggling close to you as much as baring its claws. Of course, that just makes the whole thing more exciting! She’s also willing to bump uglies not just in bed but also on the rooftop, or in the bath, as long as the mood drives her! Which is JUST PERFECT.

6. Sakaue Tsukuyo (坂上 月夜); Title: 天空のユミナ; CV: 里見小春（Satomi Koharu）

Tsukuyo! The adorably adorable miko in Yumina, who unlike her crazy tsundere sister Youko, believes that everyone should just get along. That’s not to say that she’s naive, just that she’s idealistic and pure-minded. Such purity, of course, matches her miko nature perfectly. Plus, when have you ever seen a miko kicking ass with her twin, albeit big-ass, fans alone? Unlike her sister Youko who uses black element, Tsukuyo uses blue element, which fits her calm and ever-gentle demeanor.

In combat, her use of fans and spell cards makes her a valuable member. While not as destructive as the other members of my harem, her graceful attacks as well as her ability to vanish enemy skills is a handy advantage. Outside of combat, she’s definitely a refreshing sight to behold, and I’m sure that she’s more than glad to play that role of being able to make everyone’s spirits relax.

When it comes to the fuckans, Tsukuyo isn’t as pure as her sister apparently believed – after all, a woman like Tsukuyo has needs and desires too! Needs and desires that I’d more than be willing to meet!

7. Saginomiya Sunao (鷺宮 沙生); Title: クレナイノツキ; CV: 中瀬ひな(Hina Nakase)

The words “ideal wife” would fit Sunao perfectly. She’s good with any and all household chores, which is even more impressive considering that she makes do without any of the convenience seen in any contemporary home. Plus, I really love Sunao’s design. While I think long black hair would suit her more, her hair is just fine the way it is. Sunao’s charm is more about her character traits – being the perfect wife – as well as her “Oni” blood. She’s also a miko, to boot!

Thanks to her Oni disposition, Sunao’s fighting ability would probably be on the same level as Kunagi’s, only more brutal as Sunao. Her value in my harem isn’t just for fighting, of course, as being the perfect wife material plays a large part. She’s not only talented in various things (like flower arrangement, never mind her clumsiness with anything regarding technology or the modern world), she’s also graceful, lithe, and most of all, loyal. She’s also competent when it comes to keeping her calm during times of crisis, as well as restoring order in order to avoid panic. Her versatility both in and out of combat makes Sunao very important to my harem!

When it comes to the ichaicha, Sunao is predictably shy and embarrassed about such things, but nevertheless tends to get herself swept up in the heat of the moment. After all, beneath that perfect wife demeanor lies a fiery spirit just raging with passion! I just have to make sure that she doesn’t run off with any of my underwear while she’s washing them, obviously, because Sunao gets…ideas whenever her passion starts to overflow. And I’d gladly provide more loving in order to sate those barely-restrained appetites!

8. Rekshumi Parabellum (レクシュミ・パラベルム); Title: 戦女神ZERO; CV: 緒田マリ(Mari Oda)

Finally, a twin sword user in my harem! Rekshumi Parabellum, also known as the Red Shield of Leuinia, with utmost dedication to Mizu no Miko. She’s an entirely capable general, something that my harem can benefit from during battles, as a commanding presence is necessary to guide all my WMD-grade bishoujos effectively in combat. Rekshumi’s also more than capable of fending for herself in battle; while she might not have spells or the like, her skills with the sword are more than enough for her survival. She’s a woman who pushes herself above and beyond the call of duty, all for the sake of dedication and accomplishing her goal in order to protect those she cares for. That dedication to Mizu no Miko isn’t just about loyalty; it also functions both ways, as Mizu no Miko can use Rekshumi as a conduit for her power should the need arise.

With such a straitlaced character, however, Rekshumi is fazed by things such as intimate relations with the opposite sex; something she believes to have outgrown, but, as her scene with Celica has proven, was not entirely the case. After being enlightened with regards to the intricacies of sex, Rekshumi seems to have a more open mind about it – provided that it does not deter her from her duties, of course. That I can live with!

Outside of combat, I’m not so sure how Rekshumi would help. She’s used to being surrounded by maids and living in comfort in her mansion in Leuinia, so I’m not really sure how that would play out. But when it comes to the loving, I’m all for it.

Maid: Ekria Femlins (エクリア・フェミリンス); Title: 戦女神VERITA; CV: 風音(Kazane)

Last, but nowhere near the least, my trump card, Ekria Femlins. As the Princess General of Karussha, she manipulated the rulers of various countries and had them oppose Louie’s Empire after a negotiation between Menphil and Karussha resulted in the murder of Karussha’s representative. Behind the scenes, she orchestrated events in order to spread chaos and war, brought about by the Curse of Femlins taking it’s toll on Ekria’s soul. In the final encounter with Louie and company deep within Femlins Shrine, Ekria ends up killing her sister Irina in order to liberate Femlin’s power further, but loses and ends up exiled by Louie. Torn by grief and despair, she seeks out Celica in the hopes that he would live up to his promise – that if she wishes to die, all she has to do is appear before him and say so. After a long journey of seeking death, she ends up becoming Celica’s first ever apostle instead, due to the similar nature of their fates and how both are viewed by the world as unwanted existences.

Not only is she cunning and strategic, as shown by the extent to which she manipulated events, people and circumstances in Genrin 2, but Ekria is also a formidable all-around mage and fighter. She wields a whipsword, and is more than deadly with it in battle; not only that, she can use powerful AOE magic (in Genrin 2) as well as utilize arcane, strengthening and ice magic (in VERITA). Due to the Curse of Femlins on her, Ekria’s ability is easily beyond the scope of any normal human. Including her becoming Celica’s apprentice, her abilities are vastly improved, and it’s safe to say that she can hold her own against any high-ranking Majin. Her knowledge of the arcane and divine arts, her commanding presence and ability, as well as her aptitude with her whipsword, makes for a very lethal combination once she’s on the battlefield.

While fearsome in battle, Ekria Femlins also excels at other things, such as: being the absolute perfect maid! In order to please her Master, Ekria brushed up on various things that maids do, and while she was clumsy at it from the beginning, her skills improved fast. After all, when you’re immortal, you have a lot of time to learn things. Her ability at cooking, laundry, cleaning, as well as providing overall service is top-notch, even god-like, so much that if she could win battles with her maid skills alone, they’d all be unrivaled, flawless victories. With a maid like her, I would hardly have the need for any other!

And I’m not going to forget about the *cough* other service that Ekria is willing to provide to her goshujin-sama. Ekria is not only completely willing and able when it comes to doing the naughty, but she can also take the initiative as well as be the one to try out new things. As long as she feels her goshujin-sama needs it, Ekria will do it! In the middle of the enemy’s castle staging a siege? All she needs is an isolated hallway, and bam. Instant gohoubi, all for goshujin-sama’s sake. (*´Д`)ﾊｧﾊｧ

Not only is Ekria the perfect unit in battle, she’s also the perfect complement outside of battle! Ekria banzai!

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That settles it for my harem. While Merry sticks with harmony and balance, and warum with his supportive, understanding ladies who are more than willing to dish out footjobs and abuse in the guise of harsh loving, I find that I still go for WMD-grade bishoujos for my harem. Not that it’s a surprise, but most of my bishoujos aren’t just powerful out of potential alone – they’ve also had prior battle experience, making them more dangerous. Keeping a harem like mine might be perceived as bad for one’s health, but that’s what a harem is for! Unrestrained love! Plus I’ve also got bishoujos like Sunao, Tsukuyo, Kunagi and Rekshumi to calm everyone down out of battle, and Ekria to keep everyone disciplined – she does a hell of a job keeping discipline and order enforced. While my bishoujos might be WMD-grade, they’re still able to function (relatively) normal in society, and they’re not as unbalanced as one might think!

My no-need-to-worry list? Basically any type of household chore, food, clothing, survival in combat, and raunchy loving ichaicha. Any and all threats will be eliminated, and much love will be spread!